Wednesday, April 30, 2008

AFD

After working for the Government, Financial Industry and Healthcare I saw every acronym under the sun; or so I thought. While driving around Australia, roadside billboards encouraged motorists to practise (yes, with the English “s”) two AFD’s a week for better health. The billboard gave little to no hint what an AFD was, depicting photos of couples enjoying a walk together or families out at the beach. There was such a frequency of the messages as we drove from Sydney to the vineyards of Hunter Valley that my curiosity quickly became overwhelming; I had to know what an AFD was. I don’t remember who exactly provided the AFD education, it could have been a waitress at a pub, a friend or random person on the street, but it was surprising and amusing to find out the definition behind the mysterious acronym; Alcohol Free Day.

Drinking is as much part of the Australian culture as big portions are to Americans. Everywhere you go there is a pub brimming with men and women alike enjoying a pint of their favorite beer, playing darts, engaging in conversation and relaxing with family and mates. This laid back part of the Australian culture and their ability to create a community over cocktails, is one of the many things I love about the country and its people. Teetotalers would definitely declare that the entire citizenry of the Island nation has a serious drinking problem but their drinking is no more a problem then in any other place in the world. Actually, I think the Australians are much more social in their drinking and in my experience are much less apt to hide it or imbibe alone.

Apparently the frequency of their socializing is a big enough problem that the Government found it necessary to start a public awareness campaign aimed a reducing the number of days people drink and not necessarily the amount. What a country! I started wondering deep down inside under all this European blood was an Australian just waiting to come out. Encouraging people to put down their bottles 2 days a week is like an open invitation to drink 5 days a week. If a person in the United States admitted to drinking 5 or more days a week they would be met with concerned looks, sneers and rejection. As one of my Australian friends has pointed out, that is one of the many differences between a country founded by convicts and a country founded by puritans; convicts are more fun.

Upon returning home from my adventure down under we could not help but share the AFD public service message with all our friends, many who thought we were joking. Public health campaigns in the United States usually focus on nutrition, exercise or the benefits of breastfeeding. It is comical to think of how an AFD campaign would be received in the US, the types of studies needed to prove any real health benefits, and if it is even necessary in a culture more focused on short term binges then daily drinking.

Coming from a family that often enjoys too much of a good thing and always watching my caloric intake, I thought I was all too aware of my drinking patterns. The AFD campaign opened my eyes to some interesting personal patterns that included having a drink (or two) after a particularly stressful day at work, frequent attendance at happy hours, a jam packed social schedule and an inability to turn down a free drink. Suddenly, when paying very close attention to my AFDs vs. ADs (alcohol days), I realized that after joking around that 2 AFDs hardly seemed like much of a sacrifice that I often didn’t adhere to this simple guideline.

"Stay busy, get plenty of exercise, and don't drink too much. Then again, don't drink too little."
-Herman "Jackrabbit" Smith-Johannsen

ADs were often just a glass of wine with dinner which aligns with many medical studies that show a single glass of wine daily actually has plenty of health benefits. Unfortunately, my attempts to enjoy the finer wines and spirits of life in daily moderation are just that; attempts. I easily succumb to peer pressure and it doesn’t take much of an arm twist to convince me to have another at happy hour, a party, or dinner. This unfortunate trait to enjoy too much of a good thing makes it impossible to follow the healthy guideline to have a single glass of wine a day. Perhaps the Australian Government, in their AFD public health campaign, realized that their citizens are also unable to embrace moderation and opted instead to encourage weekly holidays from alcohol. Two AFDs a week is a modest goal and even with a jam packed social calendar I am finding it easier and easier to have three or four AFDs a week which is helping out with the size of my waistline and my wallet. People no longer assume if I bypass the wine or beer for an ice tea at an event that I must be sick or, *gasp*, pregnant. All it takes these days is one simple explanation; it’s an AFD.


Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Quote of the Week

It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity.
- Albert Einstein

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Taking the relationship offline

The closest I get to online dating is helping friends find a good match, write an eye-catching profile or recover from a bad date. Having picked up my husband the old fashion way, in a bar, my knowledge of online dating etiquette is quite limited. While our long distance relationship forced us to do a fair amount of “courting” through email, we did not have to wrestle with common online dating dilemmas: who to write, what to say, when to wink, if to take the relationship “off-line”, and how to meet in person. In the past I used to think that online dating was a passing fad, but the large number of my friends navigating the complex world of Match.com, eHarmony, Yahoo! Personals, Chemistry.com, DateMyPet.com, Millionaire Match, and a host of other websites is proving me wrong; online dating is probably the most common dating tool among the tech-set these days. I cannot help but wonder, with the millions of people meeting people online year after year, has the overall rules of dating changed?

It is obvious that how people meet has changed, but ultimately “real” relationships should not have transformed with the onslaught of dating and social networking websites. Whether you met online, in college, at work, through a friend, at the gym, on an airplane, or at a bar, there is a certain point in every relationship that how you met no longer matters. It is at that point that the rules of internet relationships get replaced by the more traditional tenants of any friendship, romantic or otherwise: respect, honesty, trust, loyalty, admiration, understanding, shared interests, and open communication. Unfortunately it seems like these important pillars of strong relationships are forgotten in a technology age where people have “friends” they never meet, and where everyone can all too easily lie about their backgrounds, looks, personality, interests and dreams.

It is easy to develop very casual relationships online and make “friends” on Facebook, MySpace, Multiply or any other social networking site or chat board, but this same casualness with a group of people who might share your love of underwater basket weaving should not change how you handle your flesh and blood friends. When I say handle I mean not replacing meaningful conversations, face-to-face meetings, heartfelt phone calls, and the delivery of important news through impersonal measures like email or, god forbid, text messaging. It is one thing to have an online relationship, but once you have developed a true bond with a person and started seeing, or having sex, with them outside of cyberspace, rules that govern relationships should adhere to the wisdoms of traditional tried and true friendships. It is okay to start a relationship online, but once the relationship develops into something serious it is not okay to end it that way. Breaking up with a friend or lover through email or text shows a lack of courage, respect and character, even if you met over email in the first place. Technology might change the way we meet and connect, but it is so important to remember people are more then profiles and avatars who can be “de-friended” with a click of a button. We must each fight the urge to take the easy way out of hard conversations to ensure a future for what truly keeps humanity together; love and friendship.

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